seven things that brought me joy over the last seven days or so. listed in no particular order, it’s literally all good :)
possibilities & expecting the best: pretty sure I mentioned letting go last week and this is sort of an extension of that. lately I have been feeling very open and imaginative about the best possible outcomes in any situation. “what’s the best that could happen?” I’ve been letting go of the idea that I have to do anything to deserve or receive the best that life has to offer. what if I’m deserving just because I exist? what if incredible possibilities are on their way to me and all I have to do to receive them is be myself? WHAT IF?! meditating on the best possibilities and being grateful for what I have now while also being grateful in advance for all that’s on the way has been magical.
the sweet elder at Whole Foods: I’m realizing this is my second sweet encounter with an older Black woman working at a grocery store! before it was a cashier at Trader Joe’s who told me I looked cute in my red dress. i smiled so hard you would have thought she told me my groceries were free lol. This time at Whole Foods an older Black woman was working at a table giving out coffee samples and asked if I would like some. I was barely done politely declining before she said “You look like a tea person. You just have a calm way about you.” if anyone needs me, i'll be thinking about that compliment for the rest of my life.
my girl Karen: to know her is to be constantly in awe of and inspired by her. I asked for her help on a project I was feeling stuck on and she came through with the creative insight, genuine care, and genius that she’s known for. it is such a blessing to be in community with brilliant women who mirror our brilliance back to us, call out or gifts, and insist that we take up space instead of shrinking. forever grateful that our paths crossed and that someone who was once my client I can now count among my friends.
Painterland Sisters Blueberry Lemon Skyr: I know Greek yogurt has been that girl for a while but let me tell you something, bitch! Icelandic style yogurt (skyr) takes the cake! and you know I’m not fucking around because that’s three consecutive exclamation points! I am incredibly particular about flavors and textures and have been working to create systems and routines that make it easy for me to feed myself. Oatmeal and yogurt seems like a weird combo but I promise you, with the right oatmeal and yogurt, it’s incredible. THIS YOGURT IS SO FUCKING GOOD that I think I actually wrote about it last week and forgot so I’m writing about it again because it’s still bringing me joy. and it’s not loaded with a fuckton of sugar or artificial sweeteners.
daily hugs from grandma: the other day my grandmother asked if there was anything she could do to help me. I live with her as her full-time caregiver and she shared that she feels like I run around doing too much and wants to know what she can do to help me. I immediately responded “you can give me a hug every day" and she looked surprised. I am easily the most affectionate person on this side of the family and always have been. she is my last living grandparent and I would like as many hugs from her as I can get. every single one brings me joy.
my personal growth: tears welled up in my eyes as started typing this. “I’m the only one who knows what it cost me.” Niecy Nash said that in her Emmy acceptance speech. “I'm the only one who knows how many nights I cried…” the amount of courage and resilience and belief in myself that I have had to cultivate. the amount of times that I have had to find my way back to myself or move forward while transforming into a new version of myself that I felt unfamiliar with. the amount of trauma that I have survived. the hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars spent on therapy (well worth it). my commitment to being a kind, caring member of society who takes good care of myself and others. my politics are not theory, they are put into practice every day. I like me and I’m proud of the way I keep going.